Wednesday, July 01, 2009

The Crimplene Gusset

My long-time 'friend' -a man who has never failed to make me laugh my head off, and that's just at the way he devours a chocolate bar and sniffs the wrapper-sent me a spoof email about my blog...

Lovely, twinkling blog and light of my dull, boring life that it is...

Dear Judy Jarvie

As an avid reader of your blog, may I say that you are an inspiration - not only to me but all of us on the Rosemary Conley Ward. I understand that you are a published author: Looking at your photo, it's clear you've been around the block a few times and I bet you could show us wannabes a few wrinkles! That being the case, I wonder if you would be prepared to cast a critical eye over my latest offering, The Crimplene Gusset? You will be pleased to learn that I believe that brevity and economy are the cornerstones of creative writing so I'll just be sending you the first 50,000 words. Chapter two to follow thereafter. Thank you for your time and keep up the good work. A wellwisher.

I'm doing my Marge Simpson 'hhmmmn' face. Crimplene Gusset...actually, that could be a goer! Maybe the man's got talent?
P.S. I should also add that the 'questionable friend' discussed above has assaulted me regularly with his practical jokery-the fake letter to the editor about a collector of vacuum cleaners almost ended up published (thanks to his tricks/my lack of observation skills and scant supply of letters to the editor for publication) AND I haven't forgotten the knotting the string ties of my hoodie episode when I was unable to escape in a public venue.
P.P.S. One day there will be a price to pay!
P.P.P.S. Rant over.


Jackie Ashenden said...

Your 'friend' has a knack for titles. Perhaps he could give me one for my wip! Mine is so boring in comparison to The Crimplene Gusset. ;-)

Lacey Devlin said...

Such fun! You'll never be able to call your life ordinary while he's around :)

Suzanne said...

Hee hee. We all need a friend like that.

Crimplene I'm not fond of. Reminds me too much of the home-made dresses my mother used to make us wear in the 70s (normally with a 'nice' white polo-neck jumper underneath).